The Irony of Accidental Conversation

So, the other day I was talking to a friend of mine. A good friend, we've been pretty close for almost four years now, and we were just you know, talking about nothing. In his attempt to say "how are you" (he is probably the WORST speller you will ever meet) he asked "who are you". Quite confused, I responded "who am I?". After about a gazillion years of typing - myself confused all the while - he responded with the following:

"your are sarrah loyce fletcher you love littel kids you love to help liitle kids you are a child of God you are a doughter of (insetrt parents names hear i for got them dont tell them haha) you are a wonderful young lady who has her who life ahead of her you are lots of fun to be around you are very good at everything you do you know how to spell from haha you have a beautiful singing voice you are quite brittle around your wrists haha you like men you are the only one like you".

After reading and being boggled at why in the world this friend felt a very random need to tell me who I was, I smiled to myself. Because, what a reminder from God that was to me. It may have appeared to be an accidental occurrence, but it was a reminder of who I really am, and why I have gotten to where I am.

I so often struggle with finding my identity, and I lose faith in myself more then anyone else I know does. I doubt my capabilities and I question my love and my passions, I talk about giving up, and I wish I had the mental capacity to be a quitter. But then when I see myself from someone elses perspective - however misspelled, forgetful, and silly it may be - I see what a treasure I am, how much God has given me too offer this world.

And that's what makes it worth it. Every step that I take in a direction that I'm still not comfortable with, I find a new avenue of my soul that I didn't know existed before. I start to see the things that others see in me, and I begin to see how much God has done for me. I am coming up on a lot of humongous events in my life - leaving the country, making my home here in an apartment in Seattle, becoming an Aunt for the second time, essentially growing up. And though my wrists may be brittle and break easy - my soul cannot and will not. There are too many people rooting for me, and it's high time I start rooting for myself.

So basically:

"'Once you get over the fear, then it's a cinch', she said. And then she leaped into a mountainous and unexplored region of her heart." - Unknown

The Sound of Your Soul

I live for sound.

That is, I love to HEAR things. Music, voices, that's what I love about people. I mean, don't get me wrong. I love personalities, physical charactheristics, you name it - but I LOVE voices. I feel like, when I hear people speak, I hear their soul. It's not so much what they are saying...just the sound of it. I don't know, it's weird to describe, but each different inflection of words, each different tone of voice get me giggly and fascinated.

Sooooo, if I ever tell you I love the way you say something (even if we are talking online or whaterver), it's because I hear what you are saying...like...really. I don't know if that sounds weird or whatever, it just is. I spend a lot of time listening to people, and I loveeeee it.

On Matters of the Heart

So, people have got me thinking about love lately. It could be that it's valentines day, or that the people I live with or all dating, Adam's blog on relationships, or any number of other things. But it has got me thinking about it a lot.

I've been in two relationships. They were both fabulous at the time, but ended terribly. I think this is because I lost sight of God and his plans for me in those relationships, but that's a good lesson learned.

So I was thinking about it right before Christmas, and I wrote myself a dating covenant. A little "contract" if you will between God and myself, outlining the things I want to keep my mind on. I'd forgotten about it until this morning, and when I went back and read it again...well it cleared up a lot of issues in my mind. I am so glad I wrote it honestly at a time when there wasn't anything distracting me from how I know I want to spend my life.

I guess the point of this, is to encourage you to do the same. It's important to know what you are looking for, know what you are willing to sacrifice, and remember how God asks us to live our lives. If you are interested in reading my covenant, I would be fine with that. Just send me an email or something so I can send it too you, I'm not going to post it here for the whole world to read.

So yes, that is my mini, not very in depth thoughts on love.....


Intertwined
are two hearts
together
they make one soul
separate in body
but together in Christ
living
to meet the ultimate goal.

Illuminating Illusions

Illusions
of what is
of what is not
sometimes so dark
that we cannot see
past what they make us
believe that we are seeing
but light
illusions of light
make the world seem to be
so bright and so full of something
more then the darkness we find at our cores
is the light
an illusion of
what we wish things
to be? Or is the illusion
of the darkness we perceive?
What can we say is reality, if
we do not know what we can believe
light is the opposite of the dark, one
cannot exist
without the other
so then, what can we say
to whether we prefer night
or day? we must instead realize
that the illusion is just another
illusion that hides itself in what we
think it is that we see. Light exists, as does
the dark. What matters, is what can persist.


-Sarrah Loyce 2/7/09


I'm not sure if this makes any sense...

Shakespeare....

So, I had to write my own scene for Twelfth Night for my Shakespeare class. It probably will make little sense if you don't know the story of the play, but I'm pretty pleased with my Shakespearean language/verse use. So I thought I would post it here. Enoy:

Twelfth Nigh - Scene Writing
Olivia: Here is a pearl of mine for you, love

Sebastian: For what do I owe this sweet favor, O sweet lady?

Olivia: Tis for all that you have said and done for me, my love
Come, come and marry me, and we can live in bliss

Sebastian: But what have I said or done for you my sweet?
I have ne’er seen your face, so beautiful, before today
You say ‘tis a gift for marriage,
Why dost thou wish to marry me when thou knowst me not?

Olivia: But oh my sweet, how I know thee to be
Thou art a sweet and gentle man
Whose face is softer then all
Whose sweet lips I do wish to kiss
Whose hand I do wish to hold
Come my love, put off our marriage no longer
Wed thee mine, and take me as thou own

Sebastian: Oh beautiful lady, thou knowst me not
I am not the sweetest man as you say
Oh but beauty as fine as yours
Is too much to be so mad
So yes, be my blushing bride my sweet
And I thy sweet and glowing groom.
To hold thy hand, I long
to take thy pearl, I must
[Sebastian exit to ponder, Olivia remains]
Olivia: Oh, such a man have I found
One who dost not wish to know me as he does
One who longs to know me as his wife
Before he dost claim to have known me then
Too proud to be a beggar,
Yet so sweet to by mine
Oh, I must go and find a priest
So that he might take my hand so soon
and that we might have sweet love
for ‘tis he for whom I dost swoon [Exit Olivia]